Blog | Maureen Cary Counseling | Wellesley, MA 02482

June 1, 2021 by Maureen Cary Leave a Comment

Are You an Exercise Addict?

We all know that to be healthy we’ve got to exercise regularly. But do some people take exercise too far? How much exercise is too much?

It is entirely possible to become addicted to exercise. In fact, it is estimated that 3% of regular gym-goers are exercise addicts. But this number can change dramatically depending on the specific population and type of physical activity.

As an example, research suggests that roughly 25% of amateur runners may be considered addicted to exercise while a whopping 50% of marathon runners may be addicts.

While the prevalence of exercise addiction may be low compared to other more common addictions (drugs, alcohol, gambling), considering the physical (shin splints, irregular heartbeats, fatigue) and emotional toll an exercise addiction brings, it’s important to address the issue.

What is Exercise Addiction Exactly?

Simply put, this addiction describes someone who is fanatical about physical activity despite any negative consequences. The symptoms experienced with this addiction are similar to other addictions. The only difference is the “drug” of choice here is fitness.

Symptoms of exercise addiction include:

Heightened Stimulus

There is a growing need for more and more physical activity to get the same endorphin highs, greater self-esteem, etc.

Withdrawal

On days when the addict doesn’t exercise, there is a feeling of anxiety, depression, irritability, etc.

Loss of Control

It feels incredibly challenging for exercise addicts to keep their fitness levels down to manageable levels.

Obsession

More time is given to physical fitness than to work, social life, hobbies, etc. In fact, over time, less and less time is given to social or work activities while exercise becomes even more of a priority.

Poor Decision Making

Despite illness, injury, or caution given by concerned friends and family or healthcare workers, addicts persist with their physical activity levels.

Getting Help

This article in no way intends to suggest that exercise is bad. As long as it’s done in a healthy manner, exercise obviously brings a lot of benefits to our hearts, bones, and muscles.

But when someone becomes obsessed with working out, to the extent that they begin to jeopardize their health and relationships, they have become addicted and need to seek treatment. If left unchecked, exercise addiction can be as bad for our health as being completely sedentary and inactive.

Exercise addiction can be treated through cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). This type of mental health modality helps a person discover where their addiction comes from and adjust their behavior accordingly.

If you or someone you love has an exercise addiction and would like to explore treatment options, please reach out to me.

RESOURCES:

April 1, 2021 by Maureen Cary Leave a Comment

4 Powerful Immunity Boosters

As we continue to grapple with the Covid-19 pandemic, many of us are wondering how we can boost our immune systems. You most likely know you should take more vitamin C, but here are some other ways you can give your immunity a powerful boost:

Tackle That Stress

When we’re stressed, our bodies produce stress hormones like cortisol, which weaken our immune system. This means when we are under chronic stress, our immune system is under constant attack.

It’s important to find healthy ways to tackle stress. Try exercise, meditation, and psychotherapy to help relieve the burden.

Eat Right

When you eat a typical Standard American Diet (SAD), full of refined grains and sugars and unhealthy fats, you change your gut’s microbiome (the beneficial bacteria that). And guess where 80% of your immune system is? In your gut!

Eat a healthy diet of grass-fed meats, dairy, and organic produce to give your body the nutrients it needs to be healthy and to keep your gut microbiome nice and strong.

Exercise

Exercise is important to keep our hearts, muscles, and bones strong. But in addition, exercise helps us burn through those stress hormones I talked about a little while ago. And, research has found that even a little bit of exercise can have improved microbiome diversity, which leads to a stronger immune system.

Get More Sleep

You most likely know that when you don’t get enough sleep, you feel cranky and in a fog the next day. But what you may not know is that too little sleep night after night decreases our immune function. Most adults need between 7 and 9 hours of sleep each night. Do your best to go to bed and wake up at the same time each day, even on weekends. Also, put those electrical devices away at night. The blue light those devices emit interferes with your body’s natural sleep cycle.

These 4 things may seem like common sense, but are you actually doing them? Making some lifestyle changes to ensure you are tackling stress, eating right, exercising, and getting enough sleep will keep your immune system strong so it can keep you healthy.

RESOURCES:

February 1, 2021 by Maureen Cary Leave a Comment

Can Long-Term Isolation Lead to an Addiction?

We are living through some of the most stressful times in recent history. With the global pandemic raging on, many of us are still worried about our own health and the health of our loved ones, especially our older friends and family members.

Many of us have also been hit with financial burdens. Some have lost jobs and others have had to close their businesses. How will the mortgage and bills get paid?

To make an already bad situation worse, a lot of us are still experiencing lockdown and quarantine. Many are working from home for the first time and still, others are unable to travel and be with loved ones.

This has left a majority of people feeling alone and isolated when they are already feeling they are most vulnerable.

The Link between Isolation and Drug Use

During stressful circumstances, it is a natural tendency for people to turn to drugs and alcohol as a way of coping. A study reported in the American Journal of Epidemiology found there was a 25% increase in alcohol consumption in the weeks following 9/11.

The stress and isolation of the current pandemic are putting those people who are prone to addiction at great risk. Virtual cocktail hours are now officially a thing. But how many of those cocktail hours end when the computer is shut off?

Human beings are social creatures. When you take our ability to be social away, it can lead to depression and anxiety. Even people who have no history of addiction are at risk of developing a drinking or drug problem during the pandemic as a way of coping with social isolation.

When coping with stress, it can be hard to self-monitor our behaviors, but it is incredibly important for our overall health and well-being. If you suspect you have been drinking or using any drug more than you should at this time, it’s important to be honest about that.

Ask yourself a few questions:

Has cocktail hour started earlier or gone later than usual lately?
Does the bottle of wine that used to last 3 days barely last one night?
Do you ever feel like you SHOULD cut down on your drinking or other drug use?
Have you noticed you’re thinking about drinking or using drugs more and more?
Have loved ones commented on the amount you’ve been drinking?

It’s important that you are honest with yourself at this time. And if you answered yes to one or more of these questions, it’s important that you get some help.

Many treatment centers remain open during this time. You may also want to think about speaking with a mental health counselor. If in-person sessions are not available, find a provider who offers telehealth solutions. This means you can receive treatment online.

Times are tough for everyone right now. You are not alone. If you are turning to drugs and alcohol to deal with the stress and isolation, please get the help you need.

SOURCES:

November 3, 2020 by Maureen Cary Leave a Comment

Compartmentalization: How it Hurts Men’s Relationship with Women

You’ve no doubt heard the expression “men are from Mars, women from Venus.” And while we can all point out some major differences between the sexes, typically those differences all start in one major organ – the brain!

One of the biggest complaints women tend to have about men is that they sometimes seem emotionally unavailable or distant. This distance stems from what is called “compartmentalization.”

Men tend to compartmentalize their feelings and thoughts about, well, pretty much everything. If you were to look inside a woman’s brain, you might find a comfy quilt made from her thoughts and feelings, all stitched together. Women naturally process thoughts and feelings and integrate them into one cohesive “thing.”

Now if we were to take a look inside of a man’s brain, we’re apt to find a tool cabinet with almost infinite drawers. Men don’t integrate their thoughts and feelings. They tend to file everything away, each thought and emotion getting its own compartment where it sits until the man is ready to deal with it.

Compartmentalization Isn’t Necessarily a Bad Thing

Historically speaking, men and women have played different roles within the home and society. Women, traditionally, have been responsible for raising healthy and functioning members of society. For this important task, they need to be able to think and feel at the exact same time. They need to have the skills that allow them to process and integrate thoughts and feelings.

Men, on the other hand, have traditionally been tasked with keeping the family safe, fighting the wars, and building societies, literally. These are incredibly challenging tasks and ones where it isn’t necessarily feasible to think and feel at the same time. When a man is on the battlefield, fighting the enemy and trying to stay alive so he can return to his wife and children, he doesn’t have the time or luxury of processing how he feels about having to kill others so that he doesn’t die.

In other words, compartmentalization is a natural coping mechanism for men. It has served them very, very well throughout history. Compartmentalization does not make men “bad.” It’s simply an evolutionary mechanism that has allowed men to cope.

Modernizing the Male Brain

Compartmentalization is a bit like our natural “fight or flight” mechanism. It served our ancestors well and helped keep them alive. But modern people no longer face the same life or death situations. We’re not, generally speaking, chased by wild mastodons or saber tooth tigers. These days we have mortgage payments and lengthy commutes. But our bodies still kick into “fight or flight” mode and we end up dousing our organs with stress chemicals like adrenaline and cortisol. This wreaks havoc on our health, causing diabetes, hypertension, and heart disease.

Fight or flight served its purpose, but it now tends to cause more harm than good.

Compartmentalization is similar. It definitely has served a great purpose, and it still can in certain situations. But generally speaking, compartmentalization can also wreak havoc on men’s relationships with women.

Learning to Decompartmentalize

If you’ve ever tried to wrangle a bunch of baby chicks, you know how hard it is to get them to all move in unison and toward a common destination. This is what it will feel like to decompartmentalize your mind. No one ever said becoming a more well-rounded man was going to be easy.

But in order to strengthen the relationship you have with the women in your life, you’ll need to be willing to feel awkward and uncomfortable for a little bit. You’ll need to begin to integrate your thoughts and feelings. Heck, you’ll need to even admit you have them!

Working with a therapist can be a great way for you to begin your journey. A trained therapist can give you the tools that will help you begin this important integration so you can feel a closer connection to women.

If you’d like to explore treatment, please reach out to me. I would be more than happy to discuss how I may be able to help.